Recently, another one of my Instagram reels went viral.
The video wasn’t about hitting mechanics, velocity, or showcase events. It was about something much deeper.
I talked about the reality that many Black boys who aspire to play college and professional baseball eventually face a choice between code switching and adapting.
Code switching is a survival mechanism.
Adapting is a skill.
There is a difference.
A survival mechanism is what we rely on when external conditions prevent us from fully being ourselves. It helps us navigate environments that may not always be safe or welcoming.
A skill, however, is developed through intentional training. It allows us to perform under pressure without losing who we are.
That message resonated with thousands of people. Fathers reached out. Coaches reached out. Former players reached out. Many thanked me for putting words to something they had experienced but never been able to define.
One father followed up with three thoughtful questions about raising his son. Rather than answer only him, I decided to answer every father who loves his son enough to ask these questions.
Question 1
What is the most important thing I can help my son develop that is often overlooked to find success at the next level?
The father added an important note:
“Outside of hard work, consistency, and discipline, these are traits I’ve been working on since he was a toddler.”
My answer surprised him.
The most overlooked thing is not another drill.
It is not another showcase.
It is not another private lesson.
It is advocacy and sponsorship.
Many parents understand mentorship.
Fewer understand sponsorship.
Many understand coaching.
Fewer understand advocacy.
Here is how I define the difference.
Mentorship is the floor. Sponsorship is the ceiling.
Mentors pour into you.
Sponsors open doors for you.
Mentors help you grow.
Sponsors create opportunities for others to see your growth.
The same is true for coaching and advocacy.
A coach teaches your son how to perform.
An advocate makes sure his performance is seen, understood, and valued by the right people.
Every successful athlete eventually reaches a point where talent alone is no longer enough.
Someone must be willing to say,
“You need to watch this young man.”
That is advocacy.
The second overlooked investment is a professional assessment.
Too many families confuse activity with development.
Playing more games is not necessarily development.
Taking more lessons is not necessarily development.
Traveling more weekends is not necessarily development.
Development begins with knowing where you are.
I encourage families to hire a professional scout to perform a comprehensive assessment. Use that evaluation as a baseline. Then reassess every six months.
I compare it to going to the dentist.
I don’t visit every week. I go regularly because I need objective information about my health.
Baseball development should work the same way.
Without assessment, there is no meaningful measurement.
Without measurement, there is no true development.
Question 2
What is the most overlooked skill for success in baseball?
My answer is adaptability.
Adaptability is how you respond when there is uncertainty.
Making adjustments is how you respond when there is certainty.
Those are not the same thing.
Baseball constantly introduces uncertainty.
Bad hops.
Unexpected pitches.
Hostile environments.
Failure.
Pressure.
The athletes who continue advancing are rarely the ones with perfect mechanics.
They are the ones who adapt the fastest.
Adaptability can be taught.
But it cannot be taught in comfortable environments.
It must be developed through intentional exposure to uncertainty.
This is why I distinguish between practice and training.
Practice builds habits.
Training converts habits into skills.
Training is practicing under pressure.
Here is how I define the progression.
Talent is what you do well.
Habits are what you do well repeatedly without thinking.
Skills are what you do well repeatedly without thinking while under stress.
That last part changes everything.
Pressure reveals whether habits have truly become skills.
As coaches and parents, we often spend countless hours on technical instruction.
Hit the ball this way.
Load this way.
Stay inside the baseball.
Finish through the baseball.
Those technical details matter.
But baseball eventually becomes tactical.
Can your son solve problems?
Can he adapt?
Can he make decisions under pressure?
Can he stay emotionally regulated when uncertainty appears?
Those are the skills that separate players at higher levels.
Question 3
What is the biggest pitfall you are seeing with today’s players?
Too many young athletes are being conditioned to be entertained instead of educated.
Attention spans are shrinking.
Players increasingly expect constant encouragement and immediate positive feedback.
But baseball doesn’t work that way.
Performance has consequences.
If practice does not transfer into games, something must change.
Failure is part of development.
Protecting young people from failure often prevents them from growing through failure.
Parents naturally want to protect their children.
I understand that.
But confidence is not built by avoiding adversity.
Confidence is built by overcoming it.
This is why I believe the word development deserves a better definition.
For me, DEVELOPMENT means:
Deliberate Effort to Value and Empower Learners to Obtain Personal Mastery and Excellence Through Nurturing Training.
Every word matters.
Every word builds upon the previous one.
Development is intentional.
Development is measurable.
Development is sequential.
Without a clear definition, “development” simply becomes another buzzword.
Coaching Is Important. Counseling Is Necessary.
Over the years, I have come to understand that coaching alone is not enough.
Coaching answers:
“What should I do?”
Counseling answers:
“Why do I keep doing what I’m doing?”
The combination of coaching and counseling creates transformation.
That is why I describe myself as a catalyst.
A catalyst brings coaching and counseling together to create lasting change.
Mechanics matter.
Mindset matters.
Identity matters.
Healing matters.
All of them belong in player development.
Moving From Inputs to Impact
As fathers, coaches, and organizations, we must begin thinking more intentionally.
I use a simple framework.
Inputs + Outputs + Outcomes = Impact
Inputs are what we invest.
Outputs are what we produce.
Outcomes are what changes.
Impact is the lasting difference those changes make.
If we cannot define these elements, we cannot measure them.
If we cannot measure them, we cannot improve them.
A Final Word to Black Fathers
Research suggests there are approximately 8 million youth baseball players in America between the ages of 6 and 18. Roughly 650,000 of them are Black boys.
Some people focus on how small that percentage is.
I focus on the opportunity.
Six hundred fifty thousand Black boys represent six hundred fifty thousand futures.
Six hundred fifty thousand families.
Six hundred fifty thousand opportunities to build confidence, character, leadership, and legacy.
Our sons need more than love.
They need more than prayer.
They need more than hard work.
They need clear definitions.
Intentional development.
Professional assessment.
Mentors who become sponsors.
Coaches who become advocates.
Training that teaches adaptability.
And environments that prepare them to thrive without requiring them to lose who they are.
If we do those things consistently, we won’t simply develop better baseball players.
We’ll develop better men.
And that is the ultimate win.
Featured image by iSmooth